Samantha Hoffman

WHY AM I SO FAT I mumble as I stuff handfuls of popcorn in my mouth

I just want to smerk a berl and eat and be fat and lazy and play mortal kombat and watch movies. Ugh.

For Halloween I want my boyfriend to be Chex Mix and I’ll be a Boring Potato Chip bag so he can be inside of me.

This is the biggest mug I’ve ever had. I love it more than a lot of people.

This is the biggest mug I’ve ever had. I love it more than a lot of people.

No Tumblr, I don’t want to visit the “Theme Garden.” My blog is perfect. It’s like space cotton candy.
Come back. </3

Come back. </3

I hate how it takes me a week to lose 2 pounds, but a day to gain 3 pounds.
Can I just have this&#8230;.seriously.

Can I just have this….seriously.

Little things that make me smile.

-Blunts

-Coffee

-Nutella

-When my boyfriend gives me random notes

-Freshly baked chocolate chip cookies

-When I see someone use the correct form of “you’re” or “your”

-A packed bowl

-Everything bagels

-Kettle-popped popcorn

-Waking up next to the one I love after I have a bad dream

-Watching old home videos or movies that I haven’t seen in a while

-Sleeping in

-Being in my room alone and enjoying the peace

-When I draw something really badass

-When I surprise someone and make them smile

-Still not being able to sleep on Christmas Eve

-Gerber Daisies

-Hot showers

-Having a big comfy bed

-Being able to choose what I want to wear

I smile too much…

I got my boyfriend a bacon/chicken/pineapple/bbq pizza and some trainwreck.

I better earn the best girlfriend award. Lol.

I want this inside of me.

I want this inside of me.

Lmfao.

Lmfao.